Today, as I was leaving work, I saw a woman. She had a large, swollen tummy and was blossoming in her babyness. For a moment I reached down and touched my belly, only to realize that there is emptiness there now. You aren't there - warm and safe within my womb. You're in a beautiful place - but no one can love you like me. No one can hold you just right like me. No one can appreciate that beauty and perfection like me.
How does one feel again? My heart is broken - a part of it left me when you did. I will never forget each moment, each feeling, each tear as it all came rushing out. I wonder - Will the sun shine as brightly as it did? Will the birds sing as beautiful of a song as they did? Will the tears stop and the pain end?
Even though our time together was short, Elijah, you will remain etched in my dreams. I see your fair hair, blue eyes and your daddy's smile.... I can hear your little voice calling my name. I can see it all. In my dreams. Will those dreams every become a reality?
Until we meet again,
Mommy
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